Is There Something More Beyond This World?

I Think So. Here's Why.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Last fall, while attending a church social, I struck up a conversation with a funeral director who believes we “hang around for a while” after we die.

I was fascinated.

We had a brief conversation about it (she talked, I listened), then we said our good-byes. But I thought about it a lot, then I sent her an email and asked if I could interview her more extensively, and she agreed. Our exchange is below.

So, in the spirit of thinking outside of the box, and in place of my personal essay this month, I hope you enjoy the interview and find her answers as interesting and inspiring as I do. For the sake of continuity, I’ve lightly edited our conversation.

Me: When we first spoke, you mentioned how you knew some souls "hung around" for a while. What do you experience in your work that gives you this impression?

Her: It's a feeling, you just feel it. Sometimes you just know. For me, personally, I feel like someone is near me, not a scary feeling but more of there is someone maybe in my space. When I pressed her at the social, she said she feels a tingle in the back of her knees, and this alerts her to the presence of the deceased.

Me: What, in your opinion, do you think determines who does or doesn't stay?

Her: If there was some uncertainty with the passing, maybe they don't quite realize they have actually passed. Meaning, maybe it was very quick or unexpected or maybe the person was in a confused state or didn't know where they were during the passing.

Me: How do you know when a soul is at peace?

Her: You can see it in their face. The energy is just different. It's a soft energy. I responded to a call where someone had passed very quickly, eyes open. The look on this person’s face was the most peaceful expression I have ever seen, to this day. Alternatively, you can also tell if someone passed in a not so peaceful way: clenched teeth, stressed expression. However, I DO NOT feel the soul carries that with them. I believe we leave that shit here, including evil, and I do believe that is a thing, (which is) another story altogether.

Me: Have you ever communicated with anyone?

Her: Well that depends on what you are asking specifically. I talk to them while they are with me, yes.

Me: Okay, you know this one is coming next: has anyone ever communicated with you?

Her: I have never had anyone answer me. I am glad for that. But I have seen glimpses of folks. Mostly feet, legs and just a fast glimpse and only a few times.

Me: And, as one more follow-up question, how long is a while?

Her: For me, it has only been a few days. Usually when the person's physical remains are still with me.

Me: What was the most pleasant experience you had?

Her: I have had the opportunity to work for some absolutely amazing families. The stories I have gotten to hear, and the lives that I have gotten to honor have been a gift.

Me: As a funeral director, what experiences have you had that have convinced you there is an afterlife?

Her: As a funeral director, I am immersed in death, grief, and all those feelings that go along with it. I have seen tragic deaths, suffering up to the death, untimely but possibly self-inflicted deaths, accidents and deaths that just complete the circle of our lives. I have seen big emotions and small, love and indifference. There is no specific event that makes me believe there is an afterlife, just a feeling that this, being here for the brief moment with all the life lived in that moment, it can't be it. Those that have gone still live in our hearts and minds so how can they just be gone, poof, into nothing.

Me: And lastly, have you had any experiences that have convinced you there is a higher power?

Her: Yes, and again, it is the peaceful person. They absolutely went somewhere. I don't know where, but I feel that we all go to our own version of a better place. Call it Heaven, Valhalla, the great beyond or whatever. I work with every religion and there is beauty in all of them. Therefore, I believe in an entity of pure kindness and goodness—and if they can throw in some animals, even better!

Turkey Pot Pie

I confess, one of the reasons I love Thanksgiving is for the turkey leftovers, and this month I finally made a couple of turkey pot pies with what I’d stuffed into the freezer last November. I pulled together several different recipes, included the ingredients I liked best, and used turkey stock I already had on hand as I’d made it with the carcass right after the holiday. Enjoy!

2 tablespoons olive oil

2-3 cups of cooked turkey cut into one inch sized pieces

1 -1 1/2 cups chopped onion

4 tablespoons flour

3 cups turkey stock

*1 1/2 cups whole milk

2 cups broccolini

1 cup cut carrots

1 cup sliced mushrooms

2 in pan pie crusts

2 rolled pie crusts for the tops

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. In a large cast iron or saute pan, heat the olive oil and add the onion and mushrooms and saute for 2 minutes. Season with your favorite seasoning (I chose tarragon, it’s light and flavorful). Remove the vegetables and stir in the flour. Mix to create a blond roux. Next, add the vegetables back in and stir in the turkey stock and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cook for an additional 4-6 minutes until the sauce begins to thicken. Stir in the milk and cook for 4 minutes more. Lastly, stir in the broccolini, carrots, and cooked turkey and mix thoroughly. Pour into your pie tins and place the top crust over the filling. Using a fork, press the top crust into the bottom crust, forming an edge, then cut off the extra. Make 2-3 small slices in the top crust and place the pies on a sheet pan. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, until the top crust is browning and crispy. Remove from the oven and let sit for 10 minutes before serving.

Note: I re-rolled the extra dough from the top pie crusts, and using a cookie cutter, I made pie dough cookies. I placed these on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper and baked them on the rack below the pies for approximately 10-15 minutes, until the edges had browned. Then David and I put store bought frosting on them, me buttercream, him chocolate, and we had them for dessert (my mother always made pie crust cookies with the left over dough from her pies).

the final product before it went into the pie crusts

*I used 2 cups of milk which was too much liquid, although it gave me plenty of extra I plan to mix with pasta for another dish on another night.

WIP Update

Writers write for lots of reasons, but a big one is so they can express their thoughts and feelings about a subject they find significant in some way. Diana Evans, writing in The Guardian, gives a wonderful summation of exactly why I’m trying to tell the story I’m writing now. You can find her article here.

Although I’m not part of the sandwich generation, I do understand the struggle of caring for elderly parents while also trying to carve out a life for yourself. It’s a delicate juggling act I’ve already described in another post and begs the question, what’s truly important in this world?

Evans writes about being pulled away from her work, the activities she’s determined mean the most to her in her life, and being tugged in another direction, toward activities she’s never considered to be as meaningful, like caring for an elderly parent or her almost grown children, yet how she’s come to appreciate just how meaningful they actually are. Here are a few of the lines from her essay that spoke to me.

“My attitude toward the idea of achievement is shifting. Work is the most important thing, but there are times when the other components surrounding it take precedence…Those other components are the great wheel of our existence turning, the image of who we are and how we live, and it is necessary at some juncture to stand back and look at them, to stop what we are doing, put down our tools go out into the open air and witness the reality of humanity.”

As always, thank you so much for reading! Until next month!

If you’d like to read more of The Sanguine Psychologist, hit the Subscribe button at the top of the page. Since I rarely post on Substack’s Chats, Notes, or Threads, the reason one would Follow a creator on this platform, you won’t see my published posts in your inbox unless you Subscribe! Thanks again!

xoxo

Maria